April

This was a really tough month. In late March my husband's father was hospitalized for not feeling well, thinking it was complications of his diabetes. Less than a week later he passed away from covid complications.

To say the situation was traumatic and surreal would be an understatement. It was the height of the epidemic in their state. There was a backlog at the funeral home so he couldn't get buried for two days (Jewish custom is to bury as soon as possible, most times within 24 hours or next business day depending on cemetery staffing availability). There was no funeral. Shiva, which is normally the period of seven days where the mourners gather and have visitors and meals delivered, was conducted individually by each mourner at their own home with no visitors. Calls and emails only. This was immediately before Pesach. I was working, making pesach on my own, and doing daycare while trying to be as supportive as possible to my husband who just lost his father.

Pesach came and went. It was a strange time. The weather had turned chilly and we still were fully quarantined. All shuls were closed. No guests at meals. We kept our phones on in case our families needed to reach us in an emergency. The baby was teething so no one was getting much sleep.

After the holiday, I took the baby for his 6 month appointment. The ped was only seeing patients under 2 for well-visits. As anxious as I was about leaving the house, with the baby no less, I didn't want to get off schedule with his shots. Only one parent was allowed. I masked up, put a cover over the stroller and got in the building. We had checked in over the phone before coming up. We got screened at the front, temp taken. When I got the ped office I rang the bell and was taken right to a room. No waiting room, no other contact with anyone else. The ped was fully garbed in PPE with gown, goggles, mask.

In other news, my period returned the second day of quarantine. Not sure if that was my body's plan all along while breastfeeding full time or if the stress of the situation had anything to do with it. Other than the doctor's appointment my only other time breaking quarantine was going to the mikvah. They were also taking precautions like asking everyone to wear masks and do all the preps at home.

All of our groceries are being delivered. If it can't get delivered we just don't need it. The news isn't getting any less intense and it's mentally exhausting.