Beta #3

Are they even still called betas at this point? I don't know. Another bloodwork appointment. I went in this morning for bloodwork to verify that the hcg levels are continuing to go down. They want to see it back at zero or on its way there.

Over the weekend I had various period-like symptoms and some light spotting, but no AF yet.

I had a dream last night that I went in for bloodwork today and the number came back in the 600s as a surprise to everyone. In the dream, it turned out that the doc read the second beta number of 10.8 wrong and it was actually 108 instead. Supposedly the preg was progressing all along and continued to do so after I stopped taking all the meds once we were informed of the low beta. Even though things were fine with the baby I was mad as hell and I stormed into the office to kick ass and take names. It was a really vivid dream. If only.

The lab tech was really sweet and said she was sorry about the bad news. Even though it made me cry, I appreciated that she took the time to say something instead of ignoring the bad news so as not to confront the awkward. Yes, it's awkward and it's sad but you don't ignore people who go through crap just because it's uncomfortable.

I don't know what news is good news at this point. I don't know what to hope for, so I'm just waiting to hear back from them and we'll take it from there.

My list of questions for the doc grew over the weekend and I've been rehearsing them so that I can have a normal conversation without falling apart. I want him to take a closer look at my case and instead of telling me to just keep transferring, give me some explanation as to why we shouldn't do some further testing to find out if there's an issue. We did it his way. We tried "just continue transferring" after the first fail and after the second fail. It didn't work. Your cookie-cutter protocol may work for a lot of people but it's not working for me. I am a special, one-in-a-million kinda gal and I deserve a customized protocol that will work for me.