Reasons

As baseline for IVF 7 approaches I've been getting a strong desire to do a transfer instead of a retrieval. I've got baby fever and just want to be pregnant and get the show on the road toward 9 h&h months and be over recovery and just enjoy my baby.

But I know it doesn't work that way. Not in my world. Transfer doesn't necessarily equal pregnancy and so we have to make decisions for the long run.

There are good reasons to wait for a transfer:

• First, if we do another retrieval then we potentially have more embryos. It's better age-wise and recovery-wise. Before winter break is the best time to do a retrieval so that I have time to recover physically and emotionally from the hormones.
• Second, I'm doing well on my diet and really want to give it a chance to get to my goal weight (now 19.6 lbs away). I've been yo-yoing back and forth for years and I want to hunker down and get it done. I know my weight will jump back up after retrieval when I don't have the energy to exercise any self-control -- especially since it will be right around Chanukah -- but I know I can do it if I focus, and what better way than using a healthy preg as motivation. I'm far enough removed from the last loss to let myself believe it's an actual possibility, not just an irrational fantasy.
• Third, I'd really like to give a chance to see the endocrinologist before a transfer if possible. Our appointment is scheduled for end of January. Originally that timeline was perfect when it included a Jan trip. Now that the trip may not be happening there's no need to wait until Feb to do a transfer.

Those reasons are what's keeping me from pushing for an immediate transfer. My husband believes retrieving now is better but would support a transfer instead, especially if I said I can't handle another retrieval now. I don't want to be the reason the retrieval is canceled so as much as I hate the process I'd rather not think about it too much and just get it over with. Sometimes knowing what to expect is good and bad. In this case I know it will suck, I know it will hurt, I know I will be miserable and emotional... but I also know that it will pass and that even though it will suck for a while, it won't be forever.