Grief

Over the weekend I went to a memorial for a high school classmate that passed away due to an accidental overdose. You hear about the "opioid epidemic" on the news but then a person you know falls victim and it hits home. I had not seen this classmate, or several of the other memorial attendees, since our high school graduation over a decade ago.

The memorial was held because the family wants to keep things quiet. They are sitting shiva but they did not want it announced or some people to attend. Over the course of the memorial it was made clear that the family doesn't want several friends of the deceased to show up at shiva because there are ill feelings of why the friends didn't do more to save the person. It's difficult to be friends with an addict and while I can't imagine the family's grief, I also think they're placing blame where it doesn't belong. I also disagree with their decision to sweep it under the rug but I can't judge them for grieving the way they believe is right.

I knew it would be a mini-reunion with everyone talking about their family and kids. I managed to not talk about myself and only winced a little when one person mentioned, "We're all parents..." Even though I haven't seen this person in nearly 15 years, I went because it was a tragic loss of life worth remembering and worth mourning. It's not always about me and at that time and place it was about remembering a light that was extinguished far too soon.