HSG 2.0

The first time I had an HSG done was in December 2014 when we did all our preliminary testing before our first IVF in the summer of 2015. Last week my doctor suggested it needs to get updated since it's been a while and I've had a few chem preg and a miscarriage/D&C in the meantime.

Last time I was dehydrated and couldn't provide a urine sample so this time I came better prepared. They need to make sure I'm not pregnant but can't they just take my word for it?  After that they took me back to get vitals checked out. My weight was yikes; my bp was fine considering how nervous I was. I knew it would be uncomfortable and I didn't want to be there. She sent me back to the waiting room and I waited about 20 min while they got the room ready. At my scheduled time they took me back, had me undress from the waist down, and get up on the tiny table. Am I the only one who thinks those stirrup things are comfy? It's when they start poking inside that turns it into a nightmare.

She started with what must be the coldest speculum on the planet. Then after cleaning the cervix she started the dye which we could see on the screen spilled everywhere. I understand that's a good thing. She was able to see almost everything but she couldn't see one part. She assured me it wasn't a big deal, she just wanted to get another angle to get a complete picture of the uterus. So she adjusted the speculum and it HURT. A lot. Then she inserted a second catheter with a balloon at the end to prevent the dye from spilling out, and that also HURT. A lot. So much so that an "ouch!" escaped and she stopped to adjust to make it hurt less. It was only a few seconds but it made me tear up and I was trying so hard not to cry. It hurt a lot more than I remember.

She was done a few min after that and showed me the results, telling me everything looked fine. She hadn't been able to see the bottom of the uterus with the first catheter so that's why she added the second one with the balloon. Better to do it all now than have to come back for being sloppy and only getting half pictures. While she was explaining the pictures a nurse was checking my blood pressure and it was through the roof. The doc left but the nurse stayed to clean up and when I saw she wasn't leaving I walked the two feet from the table to the dressing room bare butt. I wanted to get dressed and get out.

Of course there's the niddah aspect of things. Docs say the HSG has to happen between days 5 to 12 of the cycle, which also happen to be exactly the shiva nekiim.  I've gotten pretty good at understanding the halacha to the point where I've figured out the logistical loopholes. A procedure that makes one spot or bleed from a wound doesn't count toward niddah, referred to as dam makkah, because it's not uterine bleeding. However, doing a bedika is problematic during spotting so the question then becomes how to work around it. According to halacha the minimum bedikot are a hefsek, then one bedika each on day 1 and day 7. You could do just that, but if you do get uterine spotting then you can only use the days that had a bedika as "banked." So before the procedure this morning I did a bedika to bank the days I counted so far and skipping the bedikot until the seventh day, giving a chance for things to clear up in the meantime. Between all the procedures we've done to date, the times we've had to ask the rav, and all the information on yoatzot online, I totally got this.

So that's that. It's over and I hope I never have to do it ever again.